For years, Hoda Kotb wrestled with how others labeled her as an “older mom.” Now at 61, she’s leaning into the role with gratitude, wisdom, and a perspective she says she couldn’t have found in her younger years.
The former TODAY co-anchor, who is raising daughters Haley, 8, and Hope, 6, reflected on her journey during the Sept. 23 episode of Jenna Bush Hager’s Open Book with Jenna podcast.
“I’ve often thought about being an older mom,” Hoda shared. “And it was funny. I was just reading something and, you know, a lot of moms start at 20, 25, 30, even 35, when you don’t know anything about who you are. You’re imparting your parents’ values on your kids. You’re just doing what we all do.”
The mother-of-two admitted she used to flinch when people brought up her age. “Sometimes when people would say, ‘Oh, you’re an older mom,’ I kind of get an ouch, even though it’s true … Sixty-one with a third grader and a first grader. Anyway, I am kind of sitting in the fact that I come with wisdom now,” she said.
That wisdom, she believes, has changed the way she parents. “And although I still lose it often, I think I lose it less than I would’ve in my 30s,” Hoda explained. “But I do feel like they’re getting more from me that you wouldn’t normally get from a parent who was in their 30s who hasn’t lived a life to know.”
Beyond patience, Hoda also tries to instill bigger-picture lessons in her daughters. “I was telling my kids, ’Thoughts become things,’” she said. “They go, ‘What?’ I go, ‘Thoughts become things. What you think will be. Thoughts become things. You think you’re going to fall off your bike? Watch. You think you’re going to stand up? Watch.’”
It’s a mindset she admits she wouldn’t have shared in her younger years. “So I’m trying to show them little bits and pieces, things that I would’ve never thought of or even said in my 30s, or even my 40s, maybe,” she continued.
When Jenna asked her what brings the most joy now, Hoda didn’t hesitate. “Conversations and a deep knowing of my kids,” she replied. “I don’t think I knew them that well before. But now because I sit with them and see them and listen to them and soak in all the stuff that they’re telling me. I feel like that brings me incredible joy.”
Her reflections echo what she’s said before about being a later-in-life mom. “I’m in my own skin. I know who I am. I’ve got much more patience and love and all that stuff,” she told TODAY viewers back in 2022.
Even so, the comments from others haven’t always been easy. “Sometimes, people will come up and say, ‘Wait, you’re their mother?’” Hoda recalled at the time. “But in between there are these moments that you feel an ‘ouch.’”
Despite that, she says her focus is on the bond her daughters will carry with each other long after she’s gone. “They’re going to have each other forever, and that’s what really fills me to the top. Because any older parent knows one of our secret fears is that we won’t be there for milestones,” Hoda told People Magazine in 2022.
Photo Credit: Hoda Kotb Instagram