We’ve all heard of popular parenting styles, from authoritative to gentle parenting and more. But experts agree that emotionally safe parenting is the most effective “new parenting” approach for raising confident and resilient children. According to the experts, here’s how to “emotionally safe” parent like a pro.
Before we get to how to utilize this new parenting approach like a pro, let’s first look at exactly what is emotionally safe parenting?
Per CNBC contributing writer, Reem Raouda, the goal of emotionally safe parenting, is to be deeply attuned to your child’s emotional needs. Like authoritative parenting, emotionally safe parenting sets clear boundaries and encourages independence. Emotionally safe parenting encourages parents to focus on emotional attunement, self-awareness and inner healing.
Now that we know what emotionally safe parenting is, how do parents put it into action? Here are some suggestions, from the experts, to add to your parenting toolbox!
Do the emotional work for yourself first
Parents can not help emotionally safe parent their children if they haven’t put in the work for themselves first. This new parenting style begins begins with the adult first, not the child. Reflect on your own childhood, emotional triggers, and traumas in the sense of how they shaped who you are today. You may have to put in some work for yourself first, but it will be worth it for everyone in the end.
Learn to validate your child’s feelings
One of the cornerstones of emotionally safe parenting is validating your child’s feelings, even if you don’t agree with them.
Set empathetic boundaries
Discipline is still part of emotionally safe parenting, but it’s done with empathy and respect. Instead of using fear or shame as motivators, experts recommend clear, consistent boundaries paired with calm explanations.
Be mindful of your own reactions to situations
Children learn emotional regulation by watching their caregivers. That’s why it’s crucial to model calm, respectful behavior—even when things get tense.
Create check-in rituals
Daily check-ins, bedtime chats, or even shared hobbies can help build a strong emotional foundation. These small rituals provide safe opportunities for kids to open up and feel valued. Consistency here is key! And of course, do more listening to your child than not.
Lastly, encourage your child to take the lead when problem solving
Rather than immediately jumping in to fix every problem, emotionally safe parenting encourages guiding children to think critically and problem-solve. Ask open-ended questions to help guide them to solving the problem themselves. In other words, let take over the drivers seat.
Emotionally safe parenting isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being present, responsive, and emotionally attuned to your child’s needs. The experts agree: when children feel safe emotionally, they’re more likely to thrive socially, academically, and personally.